Archive for August, 2008

Nuclear families and 2-person careers are the norm today. Gender equality in education and employment, rising costs and new generation values are the usually quoted reasons for this change.

The sailing is smooth while you are still in your twenties. Once you have a few years of experience under your belt and start raising a family, "work-life" balance becomes a nagging thought. This generation is caught between new-age ambitions and old-style values. We want to pass on our culture, tradition and values to our children, but also want more money for the fashionable house, latest car etc. More money means more office time. More office time means less time at home. Your work-life balance is severely tilted towards work.

Some people with courage (and money!) choose to drop out of the race. They either take up slow-paced jobs (with lower salaries) or follow their dream of making a profession of what they really want to do.

What about the rest of us? We need to work out strategies to improve this "balance". Of course, if you have made a conscious career choice, so be it. For others who want to run the race, but not at the highest speed, developing some strategies is important.

Here are some I have read, heard, seen or developed myself.

• Set Boundaries
• Learn to say No and feel comfortable
• Earn credits
• Establish a support system
• Schedule vacations
• Identify and manage Peak times
• Become single

Set Boundaries

The most important principle in the game. Establish clear boundaries between work and personal life and let the people around you know it.

Set apart a day off, say Sunday, when you are not reachable except for real emergencies. REAL Emergencies. Learn to distinguish what is a real emergency and communicate it to the office. Once you stick to it to the point of being stubborn, the office will quickly understand when NOT to contact you.

On this day off, do not go near anything that is remotely official, except if you use the same cell for office and personal calls. No laptop, no email and no official calls. Better yet, go out with your family leaving everything behind so as not to be tempted!

Similarly, when in office, ensure you are completely involved in work. No booking tickets or balancing your accounts. Let me tell you a secret: Long chats near the watercooler or coffee is the hallmark of a loser. if you overhear most of these conversations, its not about something about work, but whining about management. Don’t get into that trap, you are too smart for that. Build healthy relationships at work, be busy and you will never have to be that whiner. This is a subject that deserves more attention, but take it from someone who has been there.

Learn to say NO and be comfortable

Learn to say no to tasks which demand too much of you. In addition, learn to say no to yourself when you are tempted to check your email ‘just one more time.’ A recent article in the local newspaper referred to this as (adapted):

"With more and more things craving for our attention, we have stopped paying that very thing! When we check email while vacationing, we are doing justice to neither!"

Once you have the discipline to say no, let go of all your fears. You are important to your company, but you are not as indispensable as you would like to think. Fear of missing something important, a sense of exaggerated ownership, peer pressure and games of ‘one-upmanship’ stop us from feeling a sense of comfort when not in touch with the office.

Recently, I and my wife had a one-sided argument about 1 principle of "Getting things done" – checking email at scheduled times. She said that she has to constantly monitor the status from multiple computer systems and people and she cannot afford to close her mailbox while at office. Her vehemence shocked me (for the millionth time, of course). Are we in so much slavery to the interrupt-work model? Let me know your comments, while I go for a well-deserved break. Till next time, ponder.

This article was featured in The  Twenty Second Edition of the Carnival of Improving Life.